Sunday 12 May 2013

Happy Un-mother’s Day!


Today is Mother’s Day. 

I think that aside from Christmas, Mother’s Day is the other holiday when it can be difficult for women with fertility issues. It’s best to avoid reading your former high school classmates’ Facebook status updates about their children giving them Mother’s Day cards, flowers or breakfast in bed. It almost seemed like there is a competition for the “aaawww, how sweet” factor. It started getting depressing. For me, yes. Not to them, of course.

I thought it best to be kick-ass about the situation. SO I wrote this as my status update:

I think that as a society we should seriously reconsider our definition of motherhood to include all women who have nurtured us and cared for us. They may not have their own children but they have conceived many ideas and thoughts that made a difference in our lives. They have given birth to beautiful works of art. Their kindness and spirit gave birth to our new and renewed selves. So as I think of my own Nanay (mother), I also think of the many important and childless women in my life, Aunt Anne, Aunt Flor, my cousin Myrna, my former teachers – Ms. Ba-ad, Ms. Abellon, Ms. Esmero, the nuns in my school – Sr. Myrna, Sr. Julia, Sr. Godfreda. I say to you: Happy Mother's Day! You have contributed to the woman I am today.    

Friends and former students sent greetings to me which was reassuring. Just as I was preparing to write this journal, I got a heartwarming message from my 16-year old stepdaughter. 
Just wanted to say happy Mother's Day!  You truly are an inspirational person, with your free spirit, thoughtfulness, warmness and creativity! You don't have to give birth to someone to be a mother for sure because you give me so much guidance and more! And you don't have to fit the role of a stereotypical mother either! Just keep being you and that's enough for me. 
Xoxo 
Well. That wasn’t too bad for my un-Mother’s Day.